family
Drop What Hurts, Keep What Heals
Before coming to Silkworth, I spent years trying to control someone else’s drinking. I monitored, criticised, searched for bottles, and tried to manage outcomes. I was miserable—and everyone around me felt it.
When my wife got sober, I expected everything to improve. But she was progressing in her recovery, and I wasn’t. I was still stuck in fear and control. Watching her grow spiritually while I stayed angry was a wake-up call.
Silkworth helped me understand that recovery is individual. I could not manage someone else’s sobriety. I had to focus on my own healing.
The counsellors at Silkworth were direct with me—they helped me see that my anger, control, and resentment weren’t going to resolve themselves. I needed a program of my own. Once I accepted that, everything shifted. I began attending Self Help Groups several times a week and haven’t looked back.
Today, our family operates very differently. Each of us is responsible for our own program. We try to be of service, respect boundaries, and stay in our own lane. That shift has changed everything.
When my son entered treatment for chemical dependency a few years back, my wife and I were in a much healthier place. We allowed the clinical team to do their work. We didn’t interfere. Today he is sober and living independently. A couple of years later, our daughter sought treatment as well. She, too, remains sober and thriving.
The difference wasn’t control. The difference was recovery.
The moment I opened up and asked for help, things began to change. There is support available. There are people who understand. Recovery can feel unimaginable when you’re in the middle of it—but once you experience it, you realise how much better life can become.
